Sinister's Mad Experiments
by Mr. Squirrels
Summary: Crappola!!!! Yeah for me!


Disclaimer  
The X-Men belong to Marvel, not to Mr. Squirrels. I, Mr. Squirrels, however do own an oak tree. Yes, my very own tree! I will finally have respect from the other squirrels! Bawhahaha!  
  
Warning  
In no way do I guarantee these to be like the real X-Men. I a merely a psychotic squirrel with the IQ of an acorn. So if you don't like it, I hope you choke on a nut.  
  
Oh, about the other show Murder She Wrote and the character Tinker Bell, I don't own them either. If you like that show or that character, you probably won't like this. If you read it, it is your fault.   
  
I just want to add, that this isn't for the faint of heart, so if you are politically correct, you may not approve of the following piece of writing. Then again, you probably won't like anything I write.   
  
  
  
Sinister's Mad Experiments   
  
  
  
"Get him X-men!" Xavier ordered.   
  
Sinister was on the loose and they were loosing. Sinister had already knocked out Cyclops so they had no chance. Then Vertigo came in to aid Sinister.  
  
"Feel the power of Vertigo!" She released super sonic waves.  
  
"AAAAHHHH the pain!" Wolverine shouted. But Vertigo's power was too great. They fell into darkness. When Cyclops woke up he was in the Savage Land in Sinister's lab. He saw Sinister in the corner looking over some papers. He looked around next to him. All the other X-men were chained to the wall.   
  
"Let us go Sinister!" He shouted across the room that had many machines for all sorts of experiments. Sinister had placed collars around their necks to disabled his powers.  
  
"No I'm going to have fun torturing you all and testing my new experiments. For my enjoyment. Now that you can't escape I can do anything I want to you," He said loud enough to wake the other X-men. "I will deal with you first Wolverine. Wolverine prepare to feel terror the torment of seeing pictures of Angela Lansberry!" On the screen a large picture of the hideous face of Angela Landsberry was on a 62-inch screen. "You shall watch reruns of Murder She Wrote for the next 12 days with no sleep."  
  
Sinister ordered his Muraders to tie him so he couldn't get out by using his claws and placed him in a separate room with a large TV in front of him. They then taped his eyes so he couldn't close them. Sinister walked and turned the large 62 in. TV on. The show started to play. Of all the things Wolverine had ever seen, this was the scariest. The mere sight was too much for his eyes.  
  
"I can't see!!! It is so hideous! The torture!" He cried through the beginning of the show.  
  
"Bawhahaha!! Feel the true terror of Angela Landsberry's wrinkly, prune-like face!" Mr. Sinister was very happy with himself. He turned to Iceman. "As for you Iceman I shall melt you! Then I shell mold you into a guinea pig!"  
  
"NNNOOO!!!! Please have mercy!" He begged for mercy.  
  
"You Gambit I shall have the pleasure of mutating you into a girl. A girl that looks like a Sasquach! No girl or boy will ever want to look at you. You will become a monster!" Sinister said to Gambit's terrified face.  
  
"NNNNOOOONNNN!!!!" Gambit shrieked.   
  
Mr. Sinister turned his head, hiding fits of laughter, towards the next on the wall, Storm.   
  
"Storm you shall begin to know the horror of what I am about to do to you. I shall do the opposite of liposuction. I shall make you have 100% body fat. You will weigh more than the Blob. You will be so ugly no one will ever want to touch you. People will jog around you for exercise." He was so happy he started to giggle.   
  
"By the goddess you wouldn't dare do that!" She cried in disbelief.  
  
"You Warren, I shall turn into the little fairy from peter pan, Tinker Bell and wear the same incredibly short green dress that she wore in the Disney cartoon!" He bellowed out with laughter.  
  
"No! Not Tinkle-Bell you wouldn't!" Warren cried in horror. Sinister walked over towards Rouge but kept his eyes on Angel.  
  
"Yes I would! As for you Rouge you will be put into a very large cage with a jungle in it and be chased after by King Kong and his little monkey minions with crowbars and monkey wenches. There you shall be captured by them and forced to eat millions of bananas. Also you shall be groomed by his little monkey minions till you look like Tarzan. When you think things can't get worse you shall be turned into a were-monkey. HAHAHA!!!" He had never been happier in his life.   
  
" Please anything but that!" She started to cry.  
  
  
"Scott I will switch your butt with your face! Then you shall fire you optic blasts out of you rear end!" Mr. Sinister said.  
  
"NNNNNOOOOO!!!" Scott shrieked with terror.  
  
"You Xavier will grow hair! Brwahahaha!" He fell to the floor laughing.  
  
"That's not too bad," Professor X said. Sinister got up still laughing.  
  
"It will be so much hair that you won't be able to see! Then I will place you in the Sahara Desert where you shall melt under the fur! Even if you were in Antarctica you would die of heat!" He fell to the floor laughing even harder.  
  
"Oh my." Professor said.  
  
"Now take them away to feel true terror of what I can do!" He howlers at them. "It will be enough to make you all demented like me! Bawhahahaha!"  
  
The X-men were to begin the experiments immediately. The torture evil enough to make even Wolverine yell mommy!  
  
******  
  
15 days later after torturing is finished.  
  
"How do you feel now X-men!" Sinister said looking at them.  
  
He turned his head to Wolverine and the others. Wolverines lost his eye site and his eyes look like he has cataract. Professor X had grown about 10 feet of hair and he was panting louder than a dog. Rouge had cuts and browses everywhere, half her hair was ripped out. Her face and Tarzan clothes were covered in banana remains. Scott glared at Sinister out of his rear-end. At about 25 feet in diameter was Storm. Her stomach covered head and legs because it drooped on the floor. Food was all over her size 80 clothes. Hovering above the ground was Tinkle Bell. In the corner was the little guinea pig Iceman. Then came the hideous human sasquach that was a girl named Gambit, who was cry out words like, "my beautiful face what have you done to me!"   
  
"Storm fall on Sinister and destroy the machines," Xavier communicated psychically to Storm.  
  
Storm tilted towards Sinister.   
  
"Oh My G-d! She Gonna Fall And Cause A Earthquake!" Sinister screamed in terror.  
  
He ran but he wasn't able to run out from under the stomach. SQUISH!!!! Sinister was flattened into a pancake along with his machines.   
  
"X-men run away!" Xavier ordered.  
  
"But we can't get Storm out of here. SHE IS TO HEAVY!!!" Scott yelled back. "Rogue can't even lift her up!"  
  
There was an explosion and then another followed by many more. A green gas was let out and they started to cough.   
  
"Storm tr-try to roll out the window!" Scott said hacking and coughing.  
  
With a great heave Storm started to move towards the window. Wolverine stepped into Storms path. But storm couldn't stop rolling.  
  
"Wolverine MOVE!!!" Xavier shouted.  
  
Wolverine couldn't hear over the noise, he was hard at hearing from The Murder She Wrote marathon.   
  
*SQUISH!!!* And Wolverine was bowled over and he was crushed into a pancake. Even the adimantium was crushed from the weight of Storm's belly rolling over it.  
  
Storm crashed through the window, falling like a brick into the water below. With a huge splash arose a tidal wave that reached to far edges of the Savage Land. The foundation was cracked and the lab fell in a heap to the ground.  
  
*******  
  
Epilogue  
  
After the fall of Sinister's lab, Magneto and the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants regained control. When Mystique found them, Magneto ordered her to bring their unconscious bodies to him. When they all finally awoke, the X-men had a merry little tea party with Magneto, Mystique, Toad, Destiny, and Pyro. After their tea party they were sent back home as they were after the experiments.   
  
When Jean saw Scott they immediately broke up. The Professor was never seen again. Wolverine was sent to a local restaurant to be served as a crepe. Iceman was sent to the pound to be put down. Storm eventually lost her weight and became partners with Richard Simmons. Rouge and Warren were sent to Disney World. Warren was Tinkle Bell and Rouge was Tarzan, now they had to take pictures with little kids.   
  
  
Well, that is about it folks. If you are angry at this story, it is your own fault. I told you it might piss you off, so don't blame it on me.  
  
  
  
  



End file.
